Diamonds are not forever...

Half-term arrives, full of the joys of Autumn. Leaves colour and fall - well done Americans! - and I am amidst a gallop of horse chestnuts. Perhaps someone could appraise me of the correct collective? I have several children, in several venues. None with me, so I thought it might be fun to get together. Several conversations with several mothers responded 'no'. I probably overdid the argument.

Oh dear! I think I have overdone the vitriole. But not the Sertraline that is meant to keep me in a state similar to the full bottle in front of me. Adjust the words if you are a wife. Never mind, eh? What's another marriage in the general scheme of things? Another job might be useful...but whither does the greenback beckon? Times are not good for an old boy, especially if you are not really sure what you want to do with the end of your life.

I thought I might try online freelancing - which sounds kind of racy. Then I discovered that one needs a skill to effect any contracts, and so I withdrew with a good grace. I also discovered that one needs a skill to master any type of job these days, so I am finished. A graduate of the early 1980s blinked into the cold light of Thatcher's dawn and decided that UB40 was preferable. Nowadays everyone, including the janitor at the infant school - I was one once, remember? - has a degree. Unluckily for me, mine is not in housepaint management, or school football recovery.

Score one for the Sertraline and the sleeping pills........see you as a cat?

C'est la guerre!